Well, my loyal readership, it has been many moons since my last transmission.
But much has been happening in the world of Jordan.
And by much, I mean absolutely nothing!

Actually, there have been some rather worrying developments within the last couple of days.
I have a rat.
And you might ask yourself, is this a pet rat? Did you purchase him at a local pet shop?
And I would say, No!
Anyway, enough of hypothetical conversations, lets just get to what’s happening in the realm of rattery!
So a couple nights ago I hear this scuttling about in my ceiling and I tell the proper authorities (mom and dad) and they tell me that its just the pipes, they are cold and when the hot water runs through them, they expand, squeak, run haphazardly around the ceiling, stop, start running again, and gain the ability to carry the plague.
Now, if you know me, you know I’m pretty tough, and if you don’t, let’s just say that I’ve been in my fair share of tussles. But don’t judge me when I tell you that a rat has the ability to bring me to the verge of almost gleeful terror. You know when you get so tense that you just start to laugh at nothing, like a fucking maniac?
It’s like, oh shit; did he breach one of the walls yet?
*scuttle scuttle*
HAHAHA fuckers still up there, oh shit, what if he comes while I’m asleep and bites me and what if he’s carrying rabies, or the hanta virus, or even the T-virus!
I can just picture that little fucker getting all up in my stuff, playing my 360, fuckin up my rubicks cube, unsealing limited edition toys. And to him, nothing is better. But as soon as I put my head up to see where the fuckers at, he’s gone, back up into the ceiling, and there isn’t a sign of him anywhere, so I guess he’s using a dark portal or something. I kid you not when I say, this rat knows magicks.
Now that we’ve established that he’s obviously a special rat, like Scabbers...or, well, that’s the only one I know of; Lets move on to his fucking “scuttle”.

Understand that this is a ceiling, not exactly roomy or anything, all studs, insulation and pipes. This fucker can cook it! He’s like the fucking Flash! Everywhere at once, knowing everything, peering into my mind and shit.
Ugh, well, yeah, I’m gonna kill this fucker. Not with my bare hands though. That shit be unsanitary.
I swear to you, I will cast this darkness back from whence it came.
The 9th circle of hell, obviously.

I’ve been playing some videogames, you guys.

Yeah, a non sequitur but it’ll do.

I’ve been playing a lot of Gears of War, or GoW, also I bought a fuckin’ Wii. That shit’s hot. Been loggin some time on The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess, or, TLoZ: TP. It’s really good, I must say, 24 hours in and the end is still a way off in the distance.

Let’s get to something that I crave, and that I know you crave as well.
Words.

Non-sequitur: a statement (as a response) that does not follow logically from or is not clearly related to anything previously said

Skein: a loosely coiled length of thread or yarn wound on a reel

Acquiesce: to accept, comply, or submit tacitly or passively.

Akimbo: having the hand on the hip and the elbow turned outward

Trawl: to make a search.

That’s it homies, keep it real.

Oh, yeah, maybe some more photography soon.
Wait with bated breath.